• by Z


First things first - did anyone do anything for valentine’s? Hopefully everyone had fun, maybe had some chocolate and some lovin’?

At least one of those things come on.

I definitely had some chocolate, chocolate and pizza…yum. I was gonna go watch a movie too, but I decided to stay in.

Well anyway - I’ve been so busy man! I was busy having an emotional breakdown and busy with other things ‘cause I’m trying to finish something right now ok, but I won’t be done with it until April. Hopefully after I’m done with my thing in April, things will be looking up for me. Maybe

And can I be any more vague and redundant? Yes, yes I can actually, but this is enough I think lol

You know around December, yeah, that’s when I started being all emo and sensitive, I was going through a loss though. Yes, still. And I was angry at everything, dang, I couldn’t even stand being around myself. Of course my brother was being, has been, very supportive (surprisingly) and my best friend too. Both of them have been troopers, for sticking with me even when I was being a bit crazy, just a little bit.

I was so bad, I remember once around January, I was watching a movie with my best friend when I suddenly turned to him, who was at the other end of the room, and yelling at him - “can you stop breathing!”

Lol oh my god, it cracks me up every time I think about it. It wasn’t funny at the time, but now it’s hilarious to me.

Well after that incident, and others like it… I came to realize that I needed some time to myself, because I didn’t want to subject people to my terrible behavior. So I turned my phone off, and it was off since sometime in January, ‘cause, you know, I needed time to subdue the beast… I’m calling myself a beast now, ok then. It’s back on now though, my phone. Email works best but phone is good too.

But you know, I’m kinda glad for my “alone” time, because it gave me the opportunity to reflect on stuff. I tried to come to terms with things, and accept the type of person that I am. Or at least think that I am at least. I wasn’t really alone actually, now that I think about it, ‘cause I was mostly bumming it at my friend’s house, I was squatting over at his place. I was the couch-squatter, he kept wanting to kick me out though, but I would just tell him that - “there’s a ghost at my place! You want me to go somewhere that’s haunted?!” But he was always like - “I don’t care, go home”

It was a lot of back and forth definitely

I did go back home in the end, dammit… well there wasn’t that much food left at his place anyway… ‘cause I ate it, so I guess it was time to come back, and it’s been alright at home. Yeah It’s pretty ok.

Hey it’s Black History Month by the way, and coincidently I’ve been listening to this African artist for a few months now, and I love his music. His name is Salif Keita, and he’s a singer from Mali. Anyway, he’s badass, and African too, and awesome - did I mention that already? No I hadn’t, well he’s awesome.

Here’s some of my favorite songs of Salif Keita’s -