• by Z

Happy Hollandaise

Yes…. Like the sauce, but also – happy holidays. As in - the holidays.

Second one, not so saucy though… meh

Well, I hope everyone has been enjoying the holiday season, I know I have. I started listening to Christmas music early in October, and I even got myself a Christmas present already. I wasn't gonna wait.

We’ve had a strange time this year, and an especially weird month for sure. I don’t even want to call it November anymore, I’m just going to refer to it as “pre-December” to avoid further trauma.

Well, first we had the election business… that is still going on. I mean, how embarrassing, but anyway, that happened… still happening. Idk. Then, because of the damn politics, I got into an argument with some of my family members and even a friend of mine, who’s a douche. Lol, ok I’m sorry, he’s not a douche...

Anyway, so after about a week of not talking to them (those people who were foolish and douche-y enough to argue with me). After that week, a week of blissful, sweet, sweet peace - they apologized to me and so now we’re cool again.

Or are we cool?

No, it appears not, because now there are other things that are upsetting or ailing them, and they have to take it out on me. For instance, my brother…who’s a douche. He’s cutting right now, as in – dieting. Oof! Have you ever been around a person who is hating their life because they’re following a strict diet regimen? Well, they’re angry a whole lot, all the time actually. Like full-time PMS. And as the older, and wiser, and obviously better-looking sibling, I gotta just patiently, and quietly, listen to my bro rant and yell in my ear… because I’m so nice.

I guess I can't be all that wise if I'm putting up with all of that bs, but It’s gonna get better though.

I just feel it in my heart.

And it’s not that I’m trying to complain, because I know there is a light at the end of this holiday tunnel. What a dark, dark tunnel this is turning out to be, but I’m hanging in there, and, and, and stuff. Yeah…

I hope that everyone has enjoyed their thanksgiving by the way. I ended up having some nice turkey dinner thing for the holiday. I actually bought my thanksgiving dinner from a restaurant, already made, and it was really tasty. It served about six to eight people though, which was just a lot for me, and the few others I was spending the holiday with. And so, I ended up giving out turkey dinners to some people who work at the apartment building. I also told everyone that I made the food, even though I only had to re-heat it, but still everybody knew I was lying, because, well, I don’t cook. I don’t even think about cooking.

Still, I did receive some nice compliments about how tasty "my" food turned out, to which I replied with – “that’s so nice of you to saaaay…you’re welcome”

Hey they’re feeding my delusion, and I really appreciate that, you know. Yes, I understand that I didn’t really make anything, but can we just pretend I did? Is that just so hard? No, it isn’t.

So, there it is, the beginning of my holidays. Now I just have to get through Christmas and the new year. hmmm